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Schemas shape how we relate to others, and how we see ourselves
Schema therapy is a valuable approach for people who grew up in challenging or traumatic environments, and developed deep-rooted mental patterns (called schemas) to survive. These schemas often stay active long after the original situation has passed. They shape how we relate to others, how we see ourselves, and can hold us back from becoming who we want to be.
When old patterns get triggered
You might have noticed moments where you’re feeling okay, and then something shifts. Being disrespected, ignored, or criticised can suddenly bring on intense reactions. That might show up as:
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Emotions like fear, rage, or despair
Thoughts about being abandoned, betrayed, humiliated, or unworthy
Body sensations like a tight chest, sinking stomach, or feeling on edge
Memories of a parent’s harsh voice, being left alone, or a time you felt unseen
Afterwards, you might feel confused or disappointed in yourself. It can seem like a different version of you took over in that moment. The truth is, those reactions make sense. They were shaped by past experiences when your nervous system had to adapt to survive.
Your past shaped you, but doesn’t have to define you
The good news is that these patterns can change. Schema therapy helps you understand how your early coping formed these beliefs and responses, and gives you tools to respond differently now. Together, we can:
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Understand how your schema got formed and when it gets activated
Learn how to stay present and grounded when you’re emotionally triggered
Practice new ways of responding to situations, especially in relationships
Create more space between the trigger and your reaction, so you can make clearer choices
What our work together looks like
Our sessions will be a mix of insight, emotional awareness, and practical exercises. We’ll go at your pace, building the skills to recognise your schemas without being overwhelmed by them. Over time, you’ll be able to move from old patterns into more flexible, self-compassionate ways of relating to yourself and others.
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Schema therapy honours both your history and your potential. It doesn’t erase the past, but it helps you live more freely in the present. You don’t have to stay stuck in survival mode. There’s space to breathe, grow, and become who you’ve always been beneath the pain.